Chaiya Chaiya in Bali

Two things about India were known to every single person on the island of Bali - Shah Rukh Khan and Chaiya Chaiya. The video captures both of them in the highest of spirits.

The plight of the almighties

There was this big puja at my house today, complete with a priest, havan, katha, idols and all the other jazz. Something had told me that this was not going to be an easy experience for me. It all started when I lit the first agarbattis. I rushed into my room to eat, inhale and gulp all the anti allergy medicines I had ever been prescribed. After all those would be much needed for the smoke storm(havan) that was to follow.

But my inspiration for writing today did not arise from my own miseries but rather from something much different. After bathing the idol of Ganesh ji in various liquids and sticky semi solid materials, I was told by the priest, "Ab ganesh ji ka dhyan kijiye". (Think of the Lord Ganesh now). Somehow, such sentences have always failed to bring divine thoughts in my head. But this time I just did as I was told. I thought of Ganesh ji, poor Ganesh ji...

I started thinking how someone would feel if he was indeed treated like our lord. Have you ever known someone who just says two kinds of things to you. First a lot of meaningless flattery just to make you happy. None of which comes from the heart or being even a semblance of what he actually feels. And then comes the motivation for the flattery. He needs you to do something for him. It may be ok if someone does it the odd time, you would probably get irritated with the person if he does it again and you are best advised to maintain your distance from him if he does it again and again!

Yet hundreds of millions of us have been treating our "Gods" in this mean selfish way for thousands of years. We pray to them(flatter them) in f***ing Sanskrit. Obviously we have no intention of meaning those things from our hearts, we don't even know what the hell these lines mean. We even go to the extent of outsourcing the flattery we want to do to a different person, and he mumbles things that we don't care about in a language we don't even understand. He then declares that the lord is pleased and will in-turn bless us with prosperity and health and anything else that we may desire. Hypocrisy may be an intrinsic fabric in Indian society, but this is the sheer height of it.

And then there is the immediate physical and mental trauma that the representation of the Gods(the idols) have to go through. Imagine having smoke thrust right into your face by a plethora of followers during so called arties and all the smoke of the agarbattis burning right under your nose, then there is the baths in all kinds of funny materials, curd mixed with sugar and milk and other sticky stuff. Imagine being the god of a big temple where thousands of worshipers will put you through this every day of your existence. And the top it, constantly being in the middle of high decibel worshipers. Doesn't it all that make you feel lucky that you are 'a mere mortal'.

To all the sincere followers, if there is indeed a God and if there is indeed an afterlife, I get a very strong feeling that you will be in for worse punishment for treating your Gods in the way that you do than me for just choosing to not believe in him. Beware!

An Atheist's visit to a temple

As the forces would have it, I recently visited the Siddhi Vinayak Temple in Mumbai. There were so many people so eager to show their shraddha towards the almighty. All these people attempting to reserve with full conviction their undisputed place in his heaven.

Personally for me, the irony of the whole setting was overwhelming. That this was suppose to be the house of the most powerful force in existence who has his eyes set closest on what happens in this holy mystical place. And still ..

You could stand in a big huge line behind a thousand people to get his 'darshan' after an hour or two. Alternately you could pay 100 Rs per person and you would be taken by the side gate and go straight to him. There was a fully functional corrupt system to see the lord!! Will he not see the means that you used to get access to him when you plead for your wishes to come true or your rightful place in heaven?

The place was 'fortified' with armed military personal behind bunkers. Their presence was stronger and denser than would be at a party where several VIPs were invited. Definitely much more than any other place where ordinary mortals would be present in masses. This left me wondering why the 'almighty' required such protection? Should he not be the one protecting his worshipers instead of us mortals trying to protect his dwelling?

And then there was the pushing and shoving right in front of the lords eyes. Dude, your God just saw you push that elderly woman as you were attempting to get his darshan. Surely that will not go well in his eyes ! The irony of the place was just too overwhelming!

Now showing trailers of??

Noooo. you're wrong! this is not a simple "Now showing" pamplet at PVR. None of the movies on it were playing when I looked at the schedule! I asked the guy at the counter where these movies were playing. I was told these are the movies that they are now showing trailors of!!

Muhammad Ali Road at 2:30 AM

If there is paradise for a foodie, it is Mohammad Ali Road at night during Ramadan. People gave funny smiles and told us to enjoy ourselves as we asked the way to the place. We reached the place and it was amazing. There was food, food and more food. The firnis, shavermas, kebabs, jalebis, sweet breads.. We gulped them all :)
Muhammad Ali Road - A place truly recommended Ramadan.
Belated Id mubarakh to all.
Cheers :)

Chinese soup of Life

Any guesses as to what this is? Kemchi Soup and well... that's it!!! All of it is just a soup!! To be totally honest, I am lying a bit. I did ask the lady who served it to me to take back one more bowl of rice that was with this little serving. Also the little bowl on the centre top was what I ordered as my main course, but the remaining 5 and the additional bowl of rice that was taken away was what the Chinese call soup and soup only!!
Photographed at The Food Republic, Vivo City, Singapore.

Monster breads and stinkin pizzas

Is it made of stone or sand, maybe it's a metal scuplture or maybe it's for real. No sir, u're all wrong, the photograph above is plain BREAD. I took a photograph, but I sure didn't feel like eathing this beast... even more so when it's priced at $19.95.



Stinkin pizza anyone? They make typos for spelling at lots of places in India, but this one is definately blown out of proportions. And yes I could not assimilate the courage to order one.